tick tock

"Last night I saw you in my dreams, now I can't wait to go to sleep"

So with the realization that the baby is coming, he'she has been on my brain 24/7, so much so that last night i had a dream about her (I'm convinced that it's a girl)... i saw her so clearly black hair, brown eyes, big cheeks, Val's complexion, and cuter than a bugs ear.I picture her as a perfect mix of both me and Val. I woke up feeling excited but also feeling this incredible pressure. I'm not sure if I can be the man I have to be for my baby, but then again what choice do I have. Man i just hope both Val and the baby get through it okay, and I'm hoping to do everything I possibly can to help make that happen.
Even though my hormones aren't raging I still feel this crazy excitement coupled with anxiety topped with nervousness, and sprinkled with serenity...it's weird. Thanks for reading my concoction of random thoughts, i know I'm not the best writer, and i can be painful to read grammar mistake ridden mess. The clock is ticking...Well I cant wait to see my baby, and for right now that means holding her in my dreams. so I'm off to bed. good night peoples.~Abraham

OMG!!!

So...last thursday I went to the doctor and almost had a heart attack! I had an ultrasound b/c we are still monitoring the growth of the baby, well to my surprise the ultrasound tech tells me that the baby is 7lbs. 12oz.! The only thing that I could say was okay. My though was one month ago the baby was 4lbs. 10oz. and I still have six more weeks to grow. The doctor told me that if I go full term there is no way the baby will be under 10lbs (OMG). So it is starting to be pretty clear that I am going to have a c-section...I am very scared about this. I guess I always had it in my head that I would have a natural birth, so this is not something that I have thought about too much. Abe and I have talked about it a lot in the past couple of days and my thought right now is I just want whatever is safest for the baby.

I have definitely become a little cranky the past few days. I feel like I am getting so big and everything is such a chore to do now...even putting on socks. I am even having a hard time rolling from one side to the other. I feel like I am not ready for the baby to come but at the same I think it may be a little easier if the baby was out already.

I don't know, I guess we have to just wait and see what is to come. ~ Valarie

I'm a whale...

Sorry for the delay...my naps have been preventing me from updating the blog. Last week was my shower at work. It was a lot of fun. My partner teacher, Marielle, took a lot of time to make invitations and set everything up (the invitations were really cute!). I was cracking up the whole time because my co-workers told me their pregnancy horror stories, I even had to stop opening gifts because I was laughing so hard. We received a lot of essentials: diapers, wipes, butt paste, lotion...

I am 33 weeks and I feel really huge right now. At work I usually sit on the carpet with the kids and on the kid chairs, but lately it has been really hard to get up. I have had the "early contractions" this past week. I feel like I am going about my normal routine and all of a sudden I feel a bad pain in my lower stomach. The baby is moving so much, it is really funny b/c Abe and I sit and watch my stomach shift back and forth. Sometimes the baby moves when I'm at work and I start laughing while I'm teaching, so I just tell the kids that my baby is dancing and they laugh too.

We went to a breastfeeding class last weekend, Abe learned a lot! We got to see a lot of different storage ideas, and different pumps. It made me contemplate how long I want to breastfeed for...I think it would be nice to not have to buy formula but I'm really going to have to figure out the logistics of pumping at work (which really shouldn't be too bad cause I have a partner teacher). Our next class is on tuesday, baby basics, we have the labor and birth class on the 17th.

I am really worried that we are not ready for the baby to arrive, but I keep telling myself that he or she is going to come whether we are ready or not! ~ Valarie